I tried to get myself not to share this, because it is much too similar to my post titled ‘waiting’.

But this is on my mind much too much in this season. I am learning not to make an idol out of relationships or marriage. So, these are more words that came to my heart in the midst of this. They are ones I can read over again when my mind starts to wander, so I feel I must share in case you find something in them too.

If you think you are the kind of girl
who ought to be in love,
try thinking again

I don’t say this to be cruel 
in fact,
I am you

I’ve spent so much time waiting on the wrong kind of love, told myself I would get married
and then—
then, I would be full, complete
perfectly satisfied, but

that is no task for a mere human man

the longer I waited,
the more discouraged I became
clothed myself in shame
insatiable feelings 
waiting to be claimed

waiting
waiting 
if I give up the wait
will the desire melt, standing in this place
this place
where You are
full of mercy and grace

I sing, I sing 
of what I do not have 
now
instead
lift my voice to say
the wait is in vain 
I am Yours, now
there is love, here
I am full, here

there are the kinds of girls
that ought to be in love

it may not be you
or me
but we are still
loved

see it not as a lack
it is joy to share in suffering
run 
with endurance
into steadfast Love

We say hopeless romantic as if it is a hopeless thing to want to find romance and not be able to find it. That to believe that love is out there despite the climate of the world, despite the circumstance of your life, is to hope in vain. The truth is: we have both a hope and a great love, in Christ. So I must will myself to rejoice even if I may be in a place I never wished for or dreamed of.

As a side note, is it really suffering to be single? Really, it is just a thing that is. And if that is the lot the Lord has given me, then it is wonderful.

JG